The Elf On The Shelf Is Just Too Damn Creepy

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Creepy Christmas with Elf on the Shelf
Creepy Christmas with Elf on the Shelf
Creepy Christmas with Elf on the Shelf
Creepy Christmas with Elf on the Shelf

If there’s one Christmas tradition that is the definition of creepy, it’s The Elf On The Shelf. For those not familiar with tradition, The Elf On The Shelf is a book written in 2005. The plot is about an elf who watches children everyday during the month of December.

Then, each night the elf flies back to the North Pole and reports to Santa all of the good and bad things that the children did that day. Each book comes with its own little elf that parents hide everyday during December for their kids.

The idea of one of Santa’s elves watching everything that you and kids do leading up to Christmas just sounds like the creepiest thing ever, especially because some of the elves like to get up to mischief when no one is looking.

1.) Some elves like to draw on people while they sleep.

 

2.) Sometimes they just can’t help but play with fire.

 

3.) For some reason a few elves love to write “Redrum” all over the bathroom.

 

4.) Some elves have a tendency to party constantly, which makes it hard for them to remember anything to report to Santa.

 

5.) The elves don’t really play well with marshmallow snowmen.

 

6.) They also have some crazy ninja skills, which make them even more terrifying.

 

7.) Typically elves also don’t play well with other toys.

 

8.) See what I mean?

 

9.) Strangely enough they also have the ability to rise from the grave if something bad happens.

 

10.) Always make sure to keep the elves on the shelf and away from the fish tank.

 

11.) Also don’t let them watch any Breaking Bad, they’re easily influenced…

 

12.) Sometimes though, they’re just plain cruel.

 

13.) They’re also prone to taking hostages if they don’t get their way.

 

14.) The revenge they exact can sometimes be terrible. I feel sorry for this guy.

 

15.) There’s even a rumor that one of them tried to kill Rudolph, looks it may have succeeded.

 

16.) Also don’t let them play with snowmen, the elves tend to just let them melt.

 

17.) They also don’t care whose heads they draw on. Even babies are fair game.

 

18.) This elf is definitely trying to electrocute someone.

 

19.) They also like to enlist the help of the fruit bowl in their evil schemes by putting googley eyes on them.

 

20.) They also have no regards for family pictures.

 

21.) Or really any pictures at all.

 

22.) Umm, remember I said they don’t play well with other toys? Yeah…

 

23.) Also don’t let them watch Silence Of The Lambs. Bad things tend to happen when they do that.

 

24.) But you must remember that the elf is always watching you.

 

25.) Who knows what they’re thinking, but they’re definitely pure evil.

 

26.) Now that’s just gross.

 

27.) Eventually though, the mischievous elves will get what’s coming to them. Santa likes to feed them to the abominable snowman. Looks delicious.

 

Well, I’m convinced. No more Elf On A Shelf. It’s just way too creepy, and I don’t want to risk have a crazy elf running amok in my home. 

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[H/T] ViralNova

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